What We Learned From This Weekend in Football 10/15/2011 – The “Exposed” Edition

If you are my age, you remember Fotomat.  If you don’t remember Fotomat, then you also likely don’t remember rotary dial phones, cars that had carburetors rather than fuel injection, and the days when McDonald’s didn’t pretend to care about your health.

You don’t remember the days when you never had to dial somebody’s area code unless you were calling long-distance (another concept you probably don’t remember; calling outside your area code used to cost money before “unlimited anytime/anywhere minutes”), muscle cars with those enormous four-barrel carburetors that burned through 75-cent-per-gallon gasoline like it was cheap, Chinese fireworks, or when drive-thru breakfast didn’t include the option of apple wedges and oatmeal.

"In my day, you had an Egg McMuffin and hash browns at 8, then you had two heart-attacks by noon, and you liked it that way!"

What the hell does any of this have to do with football? Fotomat was all about when your camera wasn’t digital; when your pictures were saved on this stuff called “film,” and you had to ride your dinosaur up to these little huts which were in the entryways to strip malls, drop off your film and come back in a week to get your printed pictures. To take good pictures with those old film-based cameras, often you had to know how to set something called “exposure.”  So many football facts were exposed this weekend you might need a city full of Fotomats to contain them all.

Besides, I’m old and I just wanted to bitch about that for a couple of paragraphs before I got to my point.

1) EXPOSED: Michigan Football Still Sucks

I like Brady Hoke. I think eventually he will accomplish great things in Ann Arbor.  But this is the roadmap for Wolverine football until further notice:

  • Get fat in September on (insert MAC school here).
  • Legitimatize beating a parade of lesser talent by beating the perenially over-rated Notre Dame
  • Get EXPOSED sometime early in the conference schedule
  • Back into an 8-4 record, then get sodomized with a red-hot fireplace poker in one of those 36 Big Tweleveten/SEC New Year’s Day bowl games

2) EXPOSED: Denard Robinson is a Fraud as a Quarterback

I know Denard Robinson was on the receiving end of a bush-league cheap shot (Outrage: How did William Gholston not get kicked out of that game?), but that doesn’t eliminate the the fact the Michigan State defense exposed him.

Denard Robinson is one of the most exciting players in college football, except when it matters. With the sole exception of the 4th quarter of the Notre Dame game, Denard Robinson is a guy who a) disappears in crunch time and b) is just another running quarterback who can’t throw the damn ball.

Even in the Notre Dame game, he still threw three interceptions.

I understand he was last season’s Big Ten Offensive Player of the Year, but look at his 2010 stats from two perspectives.  First, focus solely on his passing stats; remove his rushing totals from the picture. Second, look at when his passing touchdowns occur in relation to when his interceptions occur, then look at that compared to when Michigan wins.

What you are going to see is that Robinson posted a lot of his passing stats in “garbage time;” either in blow-out wins (Indiana) or in blow-out losses (Wisconsin, Ohio State, and Mississippi State). The go back to his rushing stats and note when the rushing touchdowns occur. What it also says is that if you want to beat Michigan, make Denard Robinson throw the ball.  Michigan’s record since 2009 when Denard Robinson scores at least one rushing touchdown is 13-6; 6-6 when he doesn’t.

Back to that cheap shot for a moment… I’m an old offensive lineman, and I can promise you any dickweed who did that to my quarterback and stayed in the game would be taking his knees home in a bag.

3) EXPOSED:  Speaking of Frauds, Cam Newton Is Not Ready To Be an NFL Quarterback

It’s time to face the facts…a guy who tosses nine picks in six games does not understand the primary job of an NFL quarterback is to take care of the ball. Not only that, but he easily could have three or four more; this guy makes some seriously bad decisions. In fact, I think we need an “equal time” rule; for every comment were are going to hear from now on about Tim Tebow not being ready to play quarterback in the NFL, there should be an equal amount of commentary dedicated to the fact Cam Newton isn’t either.

4) EXPOSED: ESPN creates its own hype

All you have to do to see this in action is take a critical look at the stories ESPN promotes when they don’t have  “hard” sports news to cover. Here are my favorites from the past week.

  • LeBron James playing in the NFL. LeBron James is not playing in the NFL.  It may be one of the dumbest ideas I’ve ever heard.
  • Jim Tressel will be the next coach of the Indianapolis Colts. Jim Tressel is not going to be the next coach of the Colts.  Jim Tressel doens’t know the first thing about coaching in the NFL. Tell me the last time you saw a Tressel offense that looked even remotely like an NFL offense. Do you really expect me to believe we are going to take a surgically-rebuilt Peyton Manning and have him start running around like Terrelle Pryor?
  • Urban Meyer is going to coach Ohio State in 2012. This one has been rolling for a while, but it’s just as dumb. Urban Meyer will not be the next coach at Ohio State. why in the world would a guy who left coaching due to the stress take on rebuilding Ohio State with that crazy-ass fan base hounding his every step? Not to mention he’s got nothing left to accomplish as a coach. He’s won two national championships. He’s produced a Heisman Trophy winner.  He’s not looking to take on all the bullshit he’d have to endure in coaching in Columbus.

5) EXPOSED: Big Ten Offenses Not Named Wisconsin

By racking up 59 points on a hapless Indiana squad, the Wisconsin Badgers outscored every other ranked Big Ten offense COMBINED (#11 Michigan – 14 points, #16 Illinois – 7 points, #23 Michigan State – 28 points)

6) The BCS is a joke (again)

Does anybody really think Oklahoma is the third-best team in the country? I’m not even sure the Sooners are the best team in Oklahoma. Of course, its hard to tell because neither them or Oklahoma State have played anyone. Of course, I don’t think either of those teams could beat Wisconsin. The problem Wisconsin hasn’t beaten anybody either. Not to mention the team that gets the rap for not playing anybody (Boise State) might just be the best team in the country not currently in the SEC.

7) EXPOSED: ESPN Can’t Control @Occupy GameDay, They Can’t Even Contain It

The proof is in the signs…

 

 

Next up for the Dan Patrick Fans…East Lansing, Michigan.

8 ) EXPOSED: Jim Harbaugh is a Dick, and Jim  Schwartz Is A Sore Loser 

The minute I saw this I knew it was going to dominate Monday morning sports-talk radio. Let’s cut to the chase here. Harbaugh is a dick, and he’s always has been. You can tell this got started not over the handshake, but the shove in the back at which point you can tell Harbaugh said something to Schwartz. You knew it was intentional by the smirk when Harbaugh said during his press conference “It’s on me. I shook his hand too hard.”  In other words, Harbaugh essentially called Schwartz a “pussy” on national television.

On the other hand, if you’re Jim Schwartz, you’ve got to learn how to be the bigger guy. Short of that, go catch up to Harbaugh in the tunnel where there are no cameras before you start looking like the average bar brawler.

By the way Harbaugh, I’d like to see you pull that move with a guy like Rex Ryan or Mike Tomlin just to see how fast you’d get your ass handed to you.

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11 responses

  1. I realize that you’re no lover of Cam Newton. But slamming him for throwing 9 interceptions isn’t the most solid position. Peyton Manning is no hero, but he is a Hall of Famer and Manning tossed 14 interceptions in his first 6 games as a rookie and also had a record of 1-5. Additionally during his first six games Manning only had 6 touchdowns, a worse completion percentage then Newton (53.8), and was averaging over 80 yards less passing per game. If Newton is stilling making the same mistakes at the end of the year or next year then go ahead and kill him. But until then we should all look at him as a developing rookie who has done some exceptional things on the field.

    Solid take on the Harbaugh and Schwartz situation. The thing that keeps rolling through my mind about Harbaugh is what happened to the God loving man who gave praise to Jesus Christ after every playoff game for the Colts in 1995 season? Captain Comeback doesn’t seem to be acting very Christian nowadays.

    Cheers!

    1. Let’s break down your defense of Cam Newton…

      Are you telling me that you think Cam Newton has the potential to become a Peyton Manning-level quarterback? Your logic suggests since Manning sucked early in his career, it’s OK that Newton sucks now. Except that it’s not OK. See, there’s a world full of Newton supporters who since that huge Week One performance have been screaming from the rooftops they were right, Newton will be a great NFL quarterback. Except they are not right.

      The main stat they hang their hats on is Newton’s accumulation of passing yards. But there’s two problem’s with that. First of all, the NFL is a league with rules tailor-made to the passing game. A ham sandwich can throw for 300 yards in a game now. Go look at how many QBs throw for 300 yards and lose. The second problem is that all of his numbers are trending the wrong way, with the sole exception of his completion percentage. To me, I find it incredibly interesting that in the one win the Panthers have, it was clear they didn’t let him throw the ball down field. Why? Because he’s got more 3 INT games than he does wins.

      Now, let’s go back to that Peyton Manning analogy for a minute…I don’t ever recall anybody questioning if Manning could throw the ball. Everybody knew this guy was a franchise QB waiting to happen. Newton on the other hand had to go put on private workouts to convince people he can play quarterback at the pro level.

      Ask any school teacher and they will tell you they can tell the A students from the D students in the first few weeks. Everybody knew Manning was an A student, and he proved that. Newton’s going to prove he’s a C student, but teams can win with a C quarterback if they build the right team around him. In other words, a much better comparison for Newton is Ben Roethlisberger.

  2. Neither you nor I know at this moment what Newton “actual” NFL potential is. What I do know is that at this point in just about any rookie quarterback’s career, no one can predict their…that is unless you bring out your jump to conclusions mat.

    I make the analogy between Manning and Newton because you have been harping on Newton’s decision making, interception numbers, and win total all season long, and at this point of his career it simply doesn’t matter. He may very well continue to stink in this aspect for the remainder of his career and disappear into mediocrity. Or he might actually learn from his mistakes, like Manning did, and become a successfully NFL quarterback.

    You state that it’s not OK that Newton isn’t playing well overall. Well how do you expect a rookie quarterback to be playing 6 games into his career? There is such a thing as a learning curve and not everyone marches onto the field and lights it up. Go back and look at the statistics for different hall of fame quarterbacks and see how well they fared in their first six games in the NFL. And are we simply suppose to discount the positive things Newton has done during his first 6 games? Again, I’m not saying Newton is a future hall of famer, but to say that he shouldn’t be starting because some poor decision making and because of his statistics is ridiculous.

    Additionally, to say that Manning was a sure thing and a franchise quarterback coming out of college is absurd. There was plenty of doubt as to whether Ryan Leaf or Manning was the better prospect and even after Manning was having statistical success in NFL he still wasn’t a winner or a champion (something the fans and the media held against him). It took circumstance, a hot defense, and luck for Manning to become a playoff and Super Bowl winner. Otherwise he has always been a bum. And yes even “A” students can be bums.

    Also not sure about Roethlisberger being a better analogy since he was 6-0 in his first 6 starts completing 70% of his passes with 9TDs/3INTs. If you’re speaking to him potentially being a “C” student and still being able to win with a competent team around him that may very well be true. But you also shouldn’t slam Newton for this because how many great or “A” intelligence quarterbacks have won Super Bowls without the right compliment of players around them or a great defense?

    Lastly, I wasn’t a supporter of Newton coming out of college and still don’t think he is a sure thing by any stretch. I’m simply saying it is too early to be definitive about him six weeks into the season. Beside who would you rather have Caroling starting at quarterback…Jimmy Clausen?

    I’m sure that this is one of those topics that we’ll have to respectfully agree to disagree. But as always…Cheers man!

    1. Yeah, I appreciate you empassioned defense, and I’ glad you take the time to comment, but your are correct…we aren’t going to convince each other…

    2. I have to admit, you would be hard pressed to find somebody that has been more critical of Cam Newton than me, but even I was impressed with him yesterday.

      Having said that, there still three things that concern me about him…

      1) He throws too many interceptions, and generally makes a lot of bad decisions. In fairness, he’s a rookie; I would expect that to get better.

      2) Running quarterbacks don’t win. Look at the guys who win championships…they are runners primarily. To succeed, Newton needs to get better in the pocket…again, he’s a rookie…

      3) Character matters. Newton has left a trail wherever he’s gone, and while I haven’t heard anything in Charlotte yet, the absence of news doesn’t always mean the absence of a problem. Again, he’s a young guy; hopefully he’s learned something in the last year or so…

  3. I turned away from my cocktail for one second as the Lion-Niners game ended only to see football players, cameramen, and obviously two coaches going after each other in quite entertaining fashion.

    I’ve watched the clip a few times now and two things have caught my eye.

    First of all, as the coaches run to the left of the screen, take a look at the young photographer to the left of them, pacing himself and snapping some sweet ass photos. Someone give that kid a raise before everyone steals his pictures off the internet.

    Secondly, what the hell was Ron Jeremy doing there?

    1. Ron Jeremy was doing what he always did…getting in between two bitches.

  4. I’ll jump “out of order” on this comment based on my passion for the subjects…
    1. ESPN has a 24/7, 365-day “news” cycle to fill and will consistently create stories and amplify others because they quite simply have to put SOMETHING on the air even if it is NOTHING…this is why I am on an ESPN-diet which has me down to only actual games and perhaps 2 hours of ESPN News per day…no ESPN Radio whatsoever anymore…I must reduce exposure to all things ESPN or my head will explode.
    2. I was looking at the first release of the BCS Standings, specifically at the various “expert” computer rankings…and laughing out loud as I always do. Glad some of those jokers don’t predict the weather or we’d be in far worse shape than the “accuracy” we get from those people. Absurd way to run a big business like college football.
    3. I hope the crowds get so out of control at GameDay they storm the set and force ESPN’s show back into the Bristol studios where it belongs..and that goes double for college basketball. Absurd way to run a big business like ESPN. Everyone shouting and unable to hear each other in front of what looks like the floor of a political convention…look at MY sign…ugh.
    4. JIm Harbaugh has to my knowledge never been a likeable fellow and the NFL best get used to his antics because there will be more. Jim Schwartz should be wordly enough to know Harbaugh’s act and just have taken the high road. He should have seen that train coming and saved his “get back” for the next time they played, going for two while up by thirty points for example? The best way to humiliate an opposing coach is on the field, not during the handshake. You only humiliate yourself at that point.

  5. Terrible play call for Denard on that 4th and 1. He did have a pretty piss poor game and as a Michigan fan, it’s not looking good for him at QB. During that game i wanted Denard to get replaced by Devin Gardner. However, I’m not completely abandoning him at QB for his eventual NFL position.

    1. I am. I don’t buy running quarterbacks. Running quarterbacks in the NFL make a lot of buzz, but they don’t win championships.

  6. Well there’s 2 minutes I’m not getting back. Thanks stumbleupon.

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